More Words, Deeper Hole

For extra fun, try coming home in the dark if the circuit for the lights on either side of the bridge went out (assuming there even are such lights). At that point, crawling would seem like your safest bet. An early winter ice storm would also be impressive - as you slide off the bridge and then onto and through the thin layer of ice over the freezing cold moat. There a good chance you would escape anything worse than minor injuries, but panic followed by hypothermia doesn't sound like my favorite way to start the day.